Thing a Week 4: Words are Awesome

I am bad at opening statements. This is my opening statement, and it is irrelevant to the rest of what I'm writing about. Furthermore, it references itself, just for kicks. THIS IS BAD FORM. Anyway, this week I'm talking about words, because they're awesome. English is the lovechild of most languages, immensely complex in it's intricacies, and often self contradictory. In addition, most of the words in it are synonyms for other words, which more economically convey the point of a sentence. In other words, what's not to love? This is actually the root of my problem with most swearwords and insults. If you want to verbally abuse me, you can (and most peole who aren't related to me will) simply say something along the lines of: **** you (fill in the words with the expletive of your choice). Or maybe "You're a ****er/ing
So I ran out of clever thoughts in the middle of writing this, and I can't think if a way to finish it.
Instead, I will speak of cake. Specifically, Birthday cake. Specificallyer, the birthday cakes of my youth. When I was nought but a wee tiny lad, my family used to make me the rad birthday cakes ever. I remember once my aunt made a cake that was a battlefield, with army men and a tank. This was when I learned that feasting on the corpses of ones foes is much tastier when they are made of cake. And then there another one that was a castle, with gummi bears fighting each other, climbing the walls and suff. That one stands out in my mind particulalry, because my siblings made it and they wouldn't let me come home unti lit was finished. as I recall, i was furious at them for making something so awesome without letting me help. There was also a cake that a surfing theme, but I think that one was for my brothers birhtday. Anyway, I'm out of things to alk about, and this is the most horrible piece of writing I've ever done. I think next week will be a story, or maybe monologue. For The Variety!