my version of recipes

a very awesome game i play, called kingdom of loathing, has recently been working on creating a database of recipes for ingame foods. im insane to actually try doing this, so ive been working on writing recipes... or the kind of thing that i like to think of as a recipe.

this is the first one i wrote

Super kabob

ingredients:

1 lb. beef, chopped into eigths

1 lb pork, also eighthed (?)

1/2 lb chicken, chopped in quarters

2 whole onions

3 jalapenos. no, scratch that. habaneros. BIG ONES.

1 tomato, chopped in half.

1 potato, cut into chunks larger than anyone can reasonably expect to put in their mouth.
slice of blueberry pie

bottle of italian dressing, barbecue sauce, or the marinade sauce of your choice.
this will also require an oversize grill, or possibly bonfire, and a big stick. a HUGE stick. im talking the kind of stick that would make king kong insecure about his manhood. yeah, thats the ticket.

start by brushing everything (excpet the pie) liberally with the mrinade sauce of your choice. next, stick each piece of food on your huge stick, alternating so it doesnt get repetitous. cook over the fire/grill, flipping to prevent burning and occasionaly brushing with more sauce. when the meat is thoruoghly cooked, take off heat, then stick on the slice of pie. if youre a real man, you will then eat it without allowing it to cool, because nothing shouts manliness like a blistered tongue.

*i believe that this ka-bob could actually be made, but if you're sane youll want to divide it into about 5 different ka-bobs at least, and probably skip the pie. add the ceaser salad if you wish.